Dear Families of MiTT team "Barbarians" soldiers:
This Blog - Home Sweet Home - has been developed for the use of family members to receive and share information. Please feel free to post anything that you feel might be interesting, funny, inspirational or just relevant to other family members during the upcoming months that we will be linked by the deployment.
There are two other blogs - the clickable links to take you there are on the left.
Barbarians - News from the Sandbox - is the blog that the soldiers will be using during their training and the deployment to keep us updated. They will share photos, information, and my guess is that as the deployment goes on they will also share anecdotes of their time together.
Barbarians - Information - is the blog that we will all use to share information that is of a more "official" nature from the MiTT team, Department of Defense, the Family Readiness Groups, and the Rear Detatchment Commander at Fort Riley.
If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Thank you,
Catie Dupont
catie@silverchicks.com
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Great link to a Website that has easy Thanksgiving recipes
Hello Everyone -
Click HERE for a link to a website that has easy Thanksgiving recipes - spend more time with your MiTT team member and less time in the kitchen.
Click HERE for a link to a website that has easy Thanksgiving recipes - spend more time with your MiTT team member and less time in the kitchen.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Ten tips to help children celebrate holidays when a parent is deployed
Ten tips to help children celebrate holidays when a parent is deployed
It seems like the whole country begins to celebrate the holidays as soon as the first snowflake hits the ground. Everywhere you look there are reminders of the season: stores decorated with tinsel and garland, strands of lights hanging from streetlights, advertisements for pictures with Santa, the smell of cinnamon and cloves at the grocery store, the holiday shopping frenzy. It is nearly impossible to not notice all of the holiday hustle and bustle, but when someone you love is absent, those constant reminders can often be painful.
Military children with a deployed parent are particularly susceptible to feelings of sadness during the holidays. There’s no doubt military kids can be resilient and resourceful, but they also face some emotional challenges during the holidays. Fortunately, with a little planning the adults in their lives can ensure a holiday season full of cheer, warmth, and cherished memories.
1. Honor traditions. It is important to determine what holiday traditions you cannot do without. Even if children aren’t old enough to help make the decisions, it is good to have them present during this discussion. Don't underestimate importance of continuity and the predictability of traditions. However, if there are traditions that your family could do without, consider skipping them for the year.
2. Start new traditions. Honoring traditions is important, but there's nothing wrong with starting new ones. Mix things up a little bit. Again, it is a good idea to involve kids in these decisions. Spending the holidays in a different location, having a potluck instead of a sit-down dinner, or even camping out on the living room floor one night may be enough of a change to refocus on the positive.
3. Celebrate with the deployed person. Even if your loved one is thousands of miles away, he or she can still help you celebrate. Send a care package with a special treat; mail a scrapbook after the holidays; or ask the deployed person to send you a homemade ornament or decoration. One year, when my husband was in the field for Christmas, he made an award winning ornament. You’d be surprised at what someone can do with a little PVC pipe and duct tape.
4. Remember what the holidays are about. Regardless of which holidays your family celebrates, this time of year is about kindness, caring, love, and peace. It is important to focus on the things you are grateful for. Teaching children to be selfless and to appreciate the joy in their lives despite the hardships is one of the best gifts you can give them.
5. Have fun! Some families decide to have a few laughs during the holiday season to ease the tension. One military family had a picture of their deployed dad blown up to life size and laminated. They proceeded to include him in all of the holiday events. He was in the family holiday photo and even had a place set for him at the dinner table. Another family decided to save their big holiday celebration until dad got home in July. It was a bit hard to find a Christmas tree in the summer so they used a ficus tree instead.
6. Document the event. Get out the video recorder, camera, and journal. Even when our loved ones don't get to be there to see everything, they certainly wish they could be. It is important to get the kids involved in this process. Not only will they have fun; it will shift their focus and allow them to process the holidays from a different perspective. Even if it is as simple as sitting near a fire sipping hot cocoa and sharing memories, both the children and the deployed person will appreciate the record of the event. As years pass those preserved memories will be treasured.
7. Take care of yourself. If you are taking care of the children during the deployment, it is imperative that you take care of yourself, too. Children are amazingly perceptive, and no matter how carefully you try to mask any gloomy feelings, they will know something is wrong. Make sure you talk about your feelings, share your sadness, spend time with friends, and do things for yourself. It's important to give children the gift of a safe, predictable, and happy home.
8. Don’t be alone. Military families near or on an installation have the benefit of having their “military family” nearby, but those that live far from a base often feel isolated. I spent my first Christmas as a military wife surrounded by civilians who had no idea how I felt. I will always remember the kind words and sage advice shared with me by a retired Marine. We were not close but he made the effort to check on me weekly throughout the holidays and shared with me how much my husband surely missed me too. That comfort from someone who knew what I was going through was priceless to me. The presence of extended family can be comforting as well. Regardless of whom you feel closest too, it is okay to ask for support.
9. Talk. Let your family know that it's okay to talk about feelings. Putting on a brave face for the sake of the children usually backfires. Often, honest conversation is the only thing necessary to lift spirits. Children need to know that a caring adult is there to listen when they have something to share or ask. It's essential that adults model positive communication. If the kids know you are sad, too -- but still able to be hopeful and happy -- they will feel much better. A family pizza night where everyone shares memories and feelings would be a great way to begin celebrating the holidays. Look at pictures of past holidays or pass a journal around to share memories to be sent to the deployed person.
10. Spread the cheer. While we often feel we have enough on our hands just taking care of ourselves, reaching out and helping someone else can really change a person’s perspective, including a child’s. Whether it's helping a new military family, donating toys, visiting a nursing home, or simply vowing to genuinely wish everyone you see a happy holiday season, this focus on helping others is not only good for you but a great model for your children, and can help bring families closer together.
Military children cope with so much: new schools, changing neighborhoods, friends who move, and deployed parents. A holiday full of laughter, shared and newly created memories, and quality family time is a truly deserved gift.
Rachel Robertson is an educator and trainer focused on child development. She is also the author of Deployment Journal for Kids, a special place for military kids to record their feelings and events when a loved one is deployed. For more information and special activities for kids going through deployments, visit www.deploymentkids.com
It seems like the whole country begins to celebrate the holidays as soon as the first snowflake hits the ground. Everywhere you look there are reminders of the season: stores decorated with tinsel and garland, strands of lights hanging from streetlights, advertisements for pictures with Santa, the smell of cinnamon and cloves at the grocery store, the holiday shopping frenzy. It is nearly impossible to not notice all of the holiday hustle and bustle, but when someone you love is absent, those constant reminders can often be painful.
Military children with a deployed parent are particularly susceptible to feelings of sadness during the holidays. There’s no doubt military kids can be resilient and resourceful, but they also face some emotional challenges during the holidays. Fortunately, with a little planning the adults in their lives can ensure a holiday season full of cheer, warmth, and cherished memories.
1. Honor traditions. It is important to determine what holiday traditions you cannot do without. Even if children aren’t old enough to help make the decisions, it is good to have them present during this discussion. Don't underestimate importance of continuity and the predictability of traditions. However, if there are traditions that your family could do without, consider skipping them for the year.
2. Start new traditions. Honoring traditions is important, but there's nothing wrong with starting new ones. Mix things up a little bit. Again, it is a good idea to involve kids in these decisions. Spending the holidays in a different location, having a potluck instead of a sit-down dinner, or even camping out on the living room floor one night may be enough of a change to refocus on the positive.
3. Celebrate with the deployed person. Even if your loved one is thousands of miles away, he or she can still help you celebrate. Send a care package with a special treat; mail a scrapbook after the holidays; or ask the deployed person to send you a homemade ornament or decoration. One year, when my husband was in the field for Christmas, he made an award winning ornament. You’d be surprised at what someone can do with a little PVC pipe and duct tape.
4. Remember what the holidays are about. Regardless of which holidays your family celebrates, this time of year is about kindness, caring, love, and peace. It is important to focus on the things you are grateful for. Teaching children to be selfless and to appreciate the joy in their lives despite the hardships is one of the best gifts you can give them.
5. Have fun! Some families decide to have a few laughs during the holiday season to ease the tension. One military family had a picture of their deployed dad blown up to life size and laminated. They proceeded to include him in all of the holiday events. He was in the family holiday photo and even had a place set for him at the dinner table. Another family decided to save their big holiday celebration until dad got home in July. It was a bit hard to find a Christmas tree in the summer so they used a ficus tree instead.
6. Document the event. Get out the video recorder, camera, and journal. Even when our loved ones don't get to be there to see everything, they certainly wish they could be. It is important to get the kids involved in this process. Not only will they have fun; it will shift their focus and allow them to process the holidays from a different perspective. Even if it is as simple as sitting near a fire sipping hot cocoa and sharing memories, both the children and the deployed person will appreciate the record of the event. As years pass those preserved memories will be treasured.
7. Take care of yourself. If you are taking care of the children during the deployment, it is imperative that you take care of yourself, too. Children are amazingly perceptive, and no matter how carefully you try to mask any gloomy feelings, they will know something is wrong. Make sure you talk about your feelings, share your sadness, spend time with friends, and do things for yourself. It's important to give children the gift of a safe, predictable, and happy home.
8. Don’t be alone. Military families near or on an installation have the benefit of having their “military family” nearby, but those that live far from a base often feel isolated. I spent my first Christmas as a military wife surrounded by civilians who had no idea how I felt. I will always remember the kind words and sage advice shared with me by a retired Marine. We were not close but he made the effort to check on me weekly throughout the holidays and shared with me how much my husband surely missed me too. That comfort from someone who knew what I was going through was priceless to me. The presence of extended family can be comforting as well. Regardless of whom you feel closest too, it is okay to ask for support.
9. Talk. Let your family know that it's okay to talk about feelings. Putting on a brave face for the sake of the children usually backfires. Often, honest conversation is the only thing necessary to lift spirits. Children need to know that a caring adult is there to listen when they have something to share or ask. It's essential that adults model positive communication. If the kids know you are sad, too -- but still able to be hopeful and happy -- they will feel much better. A family pizza night where everyone shares memories and feelings would be a great way to begin celebrating the holidays. Look at pictures of past holidays or pass a journal around to share memories to be sent to the deployed person.
10. Spread the cheer. While we often feel we have enough on our hands just taking care of ourselves, reaching out and helping someone else can really change a person’s perspective, including a child’s. Whether it's helping a new military family, donating toys, visiting a nursing home, or simply vowing to genuinely wish everyone you see a happy holiday season, this focus on helping others is not only good for you but a great model for your children, and can help bring families closer together.
Military children cope with so much: new schools, changing neighborhoods, friends who move, and deployed parents. A holiday full of laughter, shared and newly created memories, and quality family time is a truly deserved gift.
Rachel Robertson is an educator and trainer focused on child development. She is also the author of Deployment Journal for Kids, a special place for military kids to record their feelings and events when a loved one is deployed. For more information and special activities for kids going through deployments, visit www.deploymentkids.com
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Deployment Countdown Widget from Yahoo.
Click HERE to be taken to a webpage that has a free download for a deployment countdown system for your computer.
Meeting Deployment Milestones: A Survival Guide
This article is from the website - myarmylifetoo.com. This website has useful information for both the military member and their families, immediate and extended.
Source: By Kelli Kirwan for LIFELines
Meeting Deployment Milestones: A Survival Guide
Saying goodbye to the one person you most want to be with is difficult, often heartbreaking. Before that last goodbye, though, there is work to be done. Every couple should create a deployment survival plan to help them meet the deployment milestones ahead.
Preparation
Nancy Mainor, mobilization and deployment coordinator at the Army Community Service at Ft. Bliss, Texas, says that having a fluid survival plan in place before deployment is a great way to successfully meet deployment milestones. Set your goals, but be flexible. Before your spouse leaves, make sure you've taken the following steps.
Be aware of the emotional cycles couples go through during a deployment.
Make sure all your legal documents are in order.
Be clear on the finances and who is using which accounts.
Joe Pederson, the Family Life chaplain at Ft. Bliss, Texas, suggests couples evaluate their spiritual and physical health, which can be stressed during deployments. Assess your lifestyle and decide if it's healthy or needs some improvement. Poor nutrition, drug and alcohol abuse, or lack of exercise can make the challenges of deployment more difficult to face.
Both Mainor and Pederson recommend participating in any family deployment briefs your service might offer. Many have programs such as the Army's Operation Ready, which gives families tips on preparing for and successfully surviving deployments.
Goals, Plans, and Milestones
Mainor suggests that couples decide on goals they'd like to accomplish. Education and physical fitness, along with learning new hobbies or improving talents, are all ways to make time fly and enrich your personal growth (link to WC article 1031 Strengthening Your Marriage by Setting Personal Goals). Set a time schedule, but don't set it in stone. These goals are meant to encourage you and give you something to work toward, not to make the deployment more stressful.
Look for volunteer opportunities. "Getting involved often helps us keep our own lives in perspective," Mainor says, "and the rewards of helping others goes a long way towards our own mental health during a deployment." Pederson adds, "It's important to maintain friendships and avoid becoming isolated."
Halfway There
"No matter how long a deployment is, about halfway through, it can seem like it will last forever" comments Mainor. "Work a road trip fund into your budget and plan to take a trip at the halfway point. When you return home, you'll be re-energized and ready to tackle the remaining time." She also suggests re-evaluating your goals at the halfway mark and adjusting accordingly. What looked plausible three or six months ago, like dropping three clothing sizes or learning Italian, now might seem unrealistic.
The Home Stretch
Planning to say hello again is much more fun than saying goodbye. Take time to participate in reunion activities that will give you realistic expectations about the reunion, as well as ideas to help make it the special day you both have imagined. Reunions don't have to be elaborate or expensive. Set money aside during the deployment for a special dinner, but keep in mind that your spouse may want to just go home.
While deployments are not easy and can be full of ups and downs, taking time to set some milestones in the beginning will help you through the separation, and you might even discover new friends and talents along the way.
Source: By Kelli Kirwan for LIFELines
Meeting Deployment Milestones: A Survival Guide
Saying goodbye to the one person you most want to be with is difficult, often heartbreaking. Before that last goodbye, though, there is work to be done. Every couple should create a deployment survival plan to help them meet the deployment milestones ahead.
Preparation
Nancy Mainor, mobilization and deployment coordinator at the Army Community Service at Ft. Bliss, Texas, says that having a fluid survival plan in place before deployment is a great way to successfully meet deployment milestones. Set your goals, but be flexible. Before your spouse leaves, make sure you've taken the following steps.
Be aware of the emotional cycles couples go through during a deployment.
Make sure all your legal documents are in order.
Be clear on the finances and who is using which accounts.
Joe Pederson, the Family Life chaplain at Ft. Bliss, Texas, suggests couples evaluate their spiritual and physical health, which can be stressed during deployments. Assess your lifestyle and decide if it's healthy or needs some improvement. Poor nutrition, drug and alcohol abuse, or lack of exercise can make the challenges of deployment more difficult to face.
Both Mainor and Pederson recommend participating in any family deployment briefs your service might offer. Many have programs such as the Army's Operation Ready, which gives families tips on preparing for and successfully surviving deployments.
Goals, Plans, and Milestones
Mainor suggests that couples decide on goals they'd like to accomplish. Education and physical fitness, along with learning new hobbies or improving talents, are all ways to make time fly and enrich your personal growth (link to WC article 1031 Strengthening Your Marriage by Setting Personal Goals). Set a time schedule, but don't set it in stone. These goals are meant to encourage you and give you something to work toward, not to make the deployment more stressful.
Look for volunteer opportunities. "Getting involved often helps us keep our own lives in perspective," Mainor says, "and the rewards of helping others goes a long way towards our own mental health during a deployment." Pederson adds, "It's important to maintain friendships and avoid becoming isolated."
Halfway There
"No matter how long a deployment is, about halfway through, it can seem like it will last forever" comments Mainor. "Work a road trip fund into your budget and plan to take a trip at the halfway point. When you return home, you'll be re-energized and ready to tackle the remaining time." She also suggests re-evaluating your goals at the halfway mark and adjusting accordingly. What looked plausible three or six months ago, like dropping three clothing sizes or learning Italian, now might seem unrealistic.
The Home Stretch
Planning to say hello again is much more fun than saying goodbye. Take time to participate in reunion activities that will give you realistic expectations about the reunion, as well as ideas to help make it the special day you both have imagined. Reunions don't have to be elaborate or expensive. Set money aside during the deployment for a special dinner, but keep in mind that your spouse may want to just go home.
While deployments are not easy and can be full of ups and downs, taking time to set some milestones in the beginning will help you through the separation, and you might even discover new friends and talents along the way.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Pre-Deployment Check List for Deployed Parents
Deployed Parent Checklists: Pre-deployment
Use these checklists to help you prepare yourself and your family for your deployment.
Communicating with Children:
Deployment is a stressful time for all family members, especially children. Communicating with children during this time of uncertainty can help ease their stress. Use the checklist below to guide you as you talk to your children about leaving.
As a Parent, I:
___ Am available to my children whenever they need to talk.
___ Allow my children to ask questions.
___ Give open and honest answers using words that they can understand.
___ Encourage my children to share feelings through words, play, drawings, etc.
___ Talk to my children about the changes to come for everyone.
___ Remind my children and myself that separation can be a time for everyone to grow.
___ Assure my children that I will miss them every day and look forward to returning home.
As a Family, We:
___ Talk about why and when I will be leaving and where I will be going, if possible.
___ Talk about what it means to be on alert, if that is my status.
___ Discuss ways we can communicate while I'm away.
___ Find some time to talk about feelings.
___ Discuss ways to feel connected while I'm away.
A printable version of this is available HERE.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Surviving Deployment Resource
There is a website dedicated to "Surviving Deployment" with hints and ideas to ease your children through the process - Click HERE to visit.
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